The 4 main reasons your habits are failing

Do you ever find yourself trying to start a new habit and then it just seems to not work or you ‘give up’? Trust me I’ve been there. It leaves you feeling: It’s that whole ‘on wagon, off the wagon’ scenario.  And you feel like you’re going in circles! The thing is, there are probably […]

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My blog is here to assist you in creating lifestyle habits that serve and fit in to your busy life. So that you can have more energy, vitality and take control of your health and perimenopause journey.


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Do you ever find yourself trying to start a new habit and then it just seems to not work or you ‘give up’?

Trust me I’ve been there.

It leaves you feeling:

  • Like a failure
  • Frustrated
  • Irritated
  • Demotivated
  • Like you don’t want to try or start again.

It’s that whole ‘on wagon, off the wagon’ scenario.  And you feel like you’re going in circles!

The thing is, there are probably some very good reasons why you haven’t been able to stick to your new habit or why you can’t maintain it.

We are so ingrained to get results and get them now that we often don’t set ourselves up for success, instead we actually set ourselves up for failure.

It’s like trying to put a toddler in Year 1. There’s no way they can cope or succeed, in fact, you’d never do it because you’d be doing more damage than good.

The same thing applies to you and your habits.

You’re setting yourself up for failure.

Our social feeds are filled with these incredible transformations, motivational quotes, and content that instead of building us for some reason ends up breaking us down.

I don’t want that for you.

I want you to understand where you could be going wrong because I want you to grow your confidence and to successfully build those healthy habits you want and need.

I feel like I need to also clarify.

Successfully DOES NOT MEAN Perfectly.

There is a very small percentage of people who can single-mindedly stick to a new habit without faltering.

So small that they are not the ones to be following.

Here are the 4 main reasons your habits are failing…

1. Too many new habits or a habit where the change is too big:

We have all done this.  We’ve set out to make too many changes and we can’t do even 1.

E.g. Cut out all sugar or walk 5km every day or wake up at 6am every morning and do 30mins of exercise and stop drinking wine.

Maybe you’re the exception to the rule but most people wouldn’t be able to maintain any of those.

Start with 1 new habit, especially if you’re a novice at whatever it is that you’re doing.

E.g. No more added sugar at home. Or I will walk 3km, 3 times a week. Or I will get up 30 mins earlier than normal during the week.

Once you have mastered that and you’re no longer consciously thinking about it, then you can up the ante.

When you make something difficult or unrealistic, it’s incredibly hard to stick to.
You need to almost make the new habit so easy it seems almost pointless. Then build on that.

This pin is an infographic about how not to fail with your habits. It lays out great new habits to start. They are: to meditate daily, to use a planner, not to sit for more than an hour at a time, to brush teeth twice daily, to plan your meals for the week, to go to bed and wake up at a set time, to drink plenty of water daily, to tell others how you truly feel, to make a gratitude list every night, and to stop negative self-talk.

2. Focusing on the result too much:

We get fixated on the result.
Rather than focusing on everyday. Focus on showing up for your new habit each day and you will suddenly find yourself at the result.  When you focus on the result changes appear to not happen fast enough.

Micro wins (doing your habit consistently) is motivation itself.
You can’t get to the end result if you don’t show up.
Focus on showing up and let the goal sit quietly in the background.

3. Losing patience:

There is no such thing as an overnight success.

Just like there is no such thing as cultivating habits quickly.
Habits take time.

But they are the foundation of everything we do so it is worth it to set realistic expectations and persevere.

Focus on the day…then the week…then the month.

4. Not changing your environment:

It is very difficult to succeed at maintaining a habit if you don’t change your environment to help you succeed.

Design your environment to succeed.

Habit: Exercise when you get home from work 
Environment: Pack or layout your clothes the night before.
You’ve removed the obstacle of deciding what to wear and time to change your mind. or the pull of the couch to sit for 5 minutes. You KNOW if you sit, you won’t get back up.

Habit: Wake up earlier to journal
Environment: Leave journal at the kettle/coffee pot with a pen.
You’ve removed the need to get up earlier, rather you’ve joined the new habit to something you do every single day.  Journal for 10 minutes while you drink your coffee.

You’ve now got the 4 main reasons your habits are failing and know how to adjust your course to help you have more success in implementing healthy habits that work and stick.

Here’s a resource that you’ll love: my Habits of Health Guide – to get you on the right track.